question for the void

I think I will need to apply for food stamps on Monday, and then stop by the local United Food Bank next Friday for good measure. I’m very blessed too in that my Church will be assisting me with basic necessities as well. I still feel guilty anytime that I have to ask for such large amounts of help, though. Anything more than asking to borrow fifty cents for the laundromat, for me, is difficult to do. I’m the type who takes care of everyone, and it’s awkward when I feel like I need people to help me (even minutely) with taking care of myself. Regardless, I just can’t ignore what amazing blessings and helps these resources are in my life. My pay-it-forward list is getting longer than I can keep up with. Hopefully a good thing, as it would seem to be.

Related tangent: I don’t think that I qualify for unemployment benefits, but I’ll check on that as a precaution on Monday as well. I’m skeptical about filing for unemployment benefits though – I’ve heard from a few people about how it can impact you being able to find a new job, since previous employers end up contributing towards your unemployment benefits somewhat (at least in the USA), or so I was told. The logic is that if those previous employers contacted, as they had to pay out a bit to support a person who no longer works for them can be a sore spot when you need a good reference. Question for the void: Has anyone else ever heard that? To this day, I don’t know if that’s true or not. I’ve not had to worry about that sort of thing for some time, so I never really fact-checked it all. Any feedback on this would be fantastic, but please give me links to your sources. (Google and I are not on speaking terms at moment. Hopefully we kiss and make-up soon.) Thanks!

kindness exists

Kindness and compassion are out there. I can prove it.

Case study, part one:

One of my friends, AD, whom I haven’t been in touch with for a long time, found out that I am unemployed. She asked me to babysit her three kids last week and again this week. She decided to pay me $10 an hour and I am reeling from how kind that was. It may not be my place to say, but I feel like that was probably a stretch for her family financial to pay me that much.

Case study, part two:

A few weeks ago, I had set up an appointment for today to get my hair cut. I only have my hair cut once a year as my hair doesn’t grow very fast, so once I quit my job it became a bigger deal than usual, because it would help clean up my appearance for my job search. After ensuring rent and all other necessary bills have been paid for this month, and using up tons of fuel in my car to go to interviews over the past week, I’m currently down to thirty-five dollars. Yeah. You have no idea how much that scares me. I didn’t anticipate my gas money being used up so fast. However, I digress:

SF is a hairdresser who works from home, and her skills are top-class. I called her yesterday to cancel my appointment once I remembered it and realized there just is no money to spare on something like this. She heard about my unemployment, and offered to do all the usual (wash, cut, style, dry) stuff for free. I couldn’t help crying. Just got back from her place and I look perfect.

…

I wanted to extend my gratitude for the many gestures of support, love, and generosity extended to me by a wide range of people over the past few months, and especially over this past week. When things are difficult, it’s the quiet acts of service that hit my heart with the greatest impact. My days are brighter because of the people who see those around them in need of someone to lean on or talk to. Thank you.

My job for today (and every day, really) is to pay those many kindnesses forward.